One Month Love Letter

I wasn't sure if I should include this personal love letter on my blog. Decision made. Here goes nothing...

    

My Dearest Charlie, 23 February, 2012

I love you til death do us part. Your my partner, my best friend, and I cannot imagine life without you. Please keep promising to me your love and commitment. No more doubting in our marriage. I just want to draw the best, our best out of each other and nothing less. 

This deployment thing is something, else, huh? Definitely the hardest thing we have faced together, I believe. My stubbornness will not let me fail at conquering it, though. We are stronger than letting a year of this separation pull us apart. As I told you before, we would be cowards to be defeated by it. 

I'm not sure of answers right now in order to be a successful team this year, but as long as we stay true to our marriage and ourselves, we should be good. 

As strong as I may be sounding by my words in this letter, I am actually weak. I still haven't found the motivation to start exercising again. That's frustrating. But, I know it's around the corner, once I get it lined up, I will get out and run or do a class. For starters, I did put on running clothes yesterday, in hopes of finding the right opportunity to just take off and challenge my out-of-shape body. It didn't happen, but it was a start. I also stopped by the Wellness Center to get a class schedule. I know exercise will make me feel so much better overall. Sorry your shifts are so long that working out can't be a part of your day. When you do find yourself with any sort of extra time, go and do it! I know you'll feel better, too! Your self-esteem shines when you've been working out and I really like that. 

Texas has had some nice weather lately so we've been trying to enjoy the outdoors as much as possible. I haven't known quite what to do with two little ones on days we're stuck indoors. Like I said, I am lacking motivation, therefore creativity, so trying to think of activities for the girls is just not coming to me so naturally. But again, I do foresee in the near future, my old self coming back to life! I'll have to get on the ball quick, as I am soon going to be caring for not only our girls but also baby Jax. I'm excited, a little nervous, but confident my naturally maternal self with quickly redeem itself. 

I hope you read my last blog. It was the first time that I thought about the love languages according to our present circumstance. It's like we can't fully exercise the love languages because we are physically apart, and have mediocre communication.  But it doesn't make them any less important to us. So it's like a double challenge to honor those languages according to what each of us need and desire. 1. words of affirmation 2. physical touch 3. gifts 4. quality time 5. acts of service. Wow… we're really not even capable of two of those for sure, and the acts of service is tricky. I guess this means that while we might be missing quality time and physical touch, we just need to almost over do it on the other three! So hint, hint on the gifts. Getting a surprise from you (flowers, massage gift certificate, getting with Kat again for some awesome earrings, love letter…) wouldn't be too shabby. We both need to get better on words of affirmation. We talked about this beforehand… let's make sure and do our parts in building each other's confidence especially with the more challenging days. As far as physical, I don't know what to say except dream about hugging and kissing each other, snuggling so good and close, and one day before we know it, we will have that again. Sexually, I just want us to commit to each other and no outside temptations. I will send you all the pictures you want/need! We are sooo going to be honeymooners when we're together again! I can't wait! 

Well, my handsome, awesome, most respectable husband, I love you so deep. Deeper than the limestone cut in the Blanco River, especially when it's gushing with Class 5 rapids! Wink! Until next time, cheers, love, happiness, peace!

Love, your admiring wife, 

Carrie