Well I waited. I waited about 7
1/2 months to see my husband for two weeks. And so did he. And so did we... the
girls have been patient little beings this year, too. And they know far
more than many think they do, even a little girl who was only 15 months when
her Daddy went away, Eva now 25 months. Out of nowhere when she was
about 18 months old, there was a week when several times crying Eva cried,
“I want my Daddy.” She knows what waiting is. She knows what missing someone
is. Ada had just turned 4 when Charlie left, by the way, and is now 2 months from turning 5. And
while this waiting thing might not be ideal, we’ve learned, we’ve grown, and I
hope have gained an essence of patience that we’ll always remember and to look
back and remember this time in a light of humility.
“We must let go of the
life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.”
Below is my thoughts I wrote on the back of a post
card while literally waiting for my best friend to arrive to me in Kew Gardens, England, to begin our “Rest and Relaxation.
2nd September
2012
I’m in Kew at this place
on the front {The Kew Greenhouse Café}, sitting waiting for Charlie. Our life
now, as we know it, is from a movie. I even admit this is just so romantic. I,
sitting at a café on one corner in Kew, an area of London, and Charlie perhaps
around the corner having his first beer in 7 ½ months at the train station pub.
I can’t help but look up searching for him, waiting for this so anticipated
moment, every couple of seconds. And it is this moment that I have wondered
about and played in my head over and over. Maybe I’ll be waiting for hours, but
I will wait for him, this man Charlie who I’m so in love with.
While it was quite romantic (still is),
I did wait for hours. I kept everyone on Facebook anxious as well when I wrote:
"I’m sitting alone in Kew
Gardens at a café waiting for my love to arrive…OMG this could be a movie… This
is and probably will be the most romantic event in my life. Sorry to rub it in,
I’m just beyond excited!"
With a record of 94 “Likes”… I still
laugh at that in a, “Wow! Really?” kind of way, I later wrote:
"I can’t believe so many
of you are happy (I think) to share in a way, in our excitement! I feel the
love and support like mad!! The day wasn’t as romantic as I was imagining as I
sat and waited for Charlie for about 7 hours before I got his call!!!...Flight
late, delayed, missed, converting dollars to donars for a pay phone?, all in a
country called Bahrain?... So the day was filled with… should I be angry,
worried, etc? Then the call came, then he came out of the Kew train Station, I
sat on a bench and nearly missed him as he snuck out of a side entrance. The
hug, yes hug, I will never forget. The first kisses were great, too! Gosh, the
relief, the love! Looking back to yesterday, it’s all still quite romantic.
After only 15 minutes reunited, we felt so natural again together, almost as
though 7 ½ months were yesterday! And watching the girls see their Daddy for
the first time today… Well, speechless! Life is good! We have 14 days to soak
up our family love, then back to (un)reality til January. Again, I’m shocked at
your support and appreciate it so much!"
Without getting into too much detail about our R&R, it was in fact
lovely, we were all overall very happy to be a family again, and really just
can’t wait for that to be a more permanent thing. While I thought I wouldn’t be
able to stop touching my husband, and wouldn’t want to let him out of my sight,
I was wrong. I wanted him to have alone time when needed, and not have me there
smothering him. I guess I could look in a mirror with that last idea, and
accept that as my own desire as well. Shoot, after being crazy Miss
Independence for so long, and didn’t want my hand being held non stop. Although,
I did long for those not too often, but often enough, meaningful hugs and kisses. Charlie was so
good to me, and the compliments he gave me in the first minutes we were
together again, I’ll never forget.
A huge lesson Charlie and I both admitted to accepting with an open
heart, is the lesson of “don’t sweat the small stuff.” We sure do know the
difference after this experience of knowing what small things are, and what big
things are, everything relative in different people’s lives of course. But in
our life together, if we could just keep in mind from this time in life and
forever after, exactly the silliness of “sweating some of the small stuff” that
we tend to get bothered about.
So now back home in (un)reality, as I’m fond of referring to it as, and
Charlie back in his, we find ourselves waiting again. And we will wait. It is
so worth the wait. The maturity and love for one another and our little family
we have welcomed this year is worth it. Now we only have 2.5 months to wait, as
the soldiers have been informed they might just be home about a month before I
expected! Woooohoooooo! One less month of worrying. The funny thing is, is when
I imagine Charlie home again, both of us just in an ongoing siiiigghhhhh
(Ahhhhhh!....Can you hear it?), I smile and think how it will be as though he was
never away. This year will possibly seem like one of the most surreal moments
in our life, once we look back on it. But thinking further, R&R seems a
little surreal now that it’s been a month since we were in that moment, but it
was also so real. I still feel Charlie’s hug. That’s what I turn to when I need
to smile.
Thanks for waiting it out with me my family and friends.
